cinderangela

I'm addicted to Owl City lately.

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 05:40:53 GMT

The stars lean down to kiss you,
And I lie awake I miss you,
Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere.
Cause I'll doze off safe and soundly,
But I'll miss your arms around me
I'll send a postcard to you dear,
Cause I wish you were here.

I watch the night turn light blue,
But it's not the same without you,
Because it takes two to whisper quietly,
The silence isn't so bad,
Till I look at my hands and feel sad,
Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly.

I'll find opposing new ways,
Though I haven't slept in two days,
Cause cold nostalgia chills me to the bone.
But drenched in Vanilla twilight,
I'll sit on the front porch all night,
Waist deep in thought because when I think of you.
I don't feel so alone.
I don't feel so alone.
I don't feel so alone.

As many times as I blink I'll think of you... tonight.
I'll think of you tonight.

When violet eyes get brighter,
And heavy wings grow lighter,
I'll taste the sky and feel alive again.
And I'll forget the world that I knew,
But I swear I won't forget you,
Oh if my voice could reach back through the past,
I'd whisper in your ear,
Oh darling I wish you were here.

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 19:56:40 GMT

"It's Christmas, for goodness sake. Think about the baby Jesus... up in that tower, letting his hair down... so that the three wise men can... climb up and spin the dradel and see if there are six more weeks of winter."

God I love my friends. Hahaha

Tick Tick... BOOM

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 18:58:28 GMT

Why do we play with fire?
Why do we run our finger through the flame?
Why do we leave our hand on the stove-
Although we know we're in for some pain?

Oh, why do we refuse to hang a light
When the streets are dangerous?
Why does it take an accident
Before the truth gets through to us?

Cages or wings?
Which do you prefer?
Ask the birds.

Fear or love, baby?
Don't say the answer
Actions speak louder than words.

Why should we try to be our best
When we can just get by and still gain?
Why do we nod our heads
Although we know
The boss is wrong as rain?

Why should we blaze a trail
When the well worn path seems safe and
So inviting?
How-as we travel, can we
See the dismay-
And keep from fighting?

What does it take
To wake up a generation?

How can you make someone
Take off and fly?

If we don't wake up
And shake up the nation
We'll eat the dust of the world
Wondering why

Why do we stay with lovers
Who we know, down deep
Just aren't right?
Why would we rather
Put ourselves through hell
Than sleep alone at night?

Why do we follow leaders who never lead?
Why does it take catastrophe to start a revolution?

If we're so free, tell me why?
Someone tell me why
So many people bleed?

Cages or wings?
Which do you prefer?
Ask the birds.

Fear or love, baby?
Don't say the answer
Actions speak louder than words.

I was right...

Thu, 21 May 2009 22:58:36 GMT

the eye of the storm has passed me by.

Here comes the rain....

Thu, 30 Apr 2009 21:54:46 GMT

So I've made up my mind
I will pretend
To leave this world behind
And in the end
You'll know I've lied
To get your attention
I'm faking my own suicide

I'm faking my own suicide
Because I know you love me
You just haven't realized
I'm faking my own suicide
They'll hold a double funeral
Because a part of you will die
Along with me

Wish you thought that I was dead
So rather than me
You'd be depressed instead
And before arriving at my grave
You'd come to the conclusion
You've loved me all your days
But it's too late
Too late for you to say

Because I'm faking my own suicide
Because I know you love me
You just haven't realized
I'm faking my own suicide
They'll hold a double funeral

Because a part of you will die
Along with me

I'll write you a letter that
You'll keep
Reminding you your love for me
Is more than six feet deep
You say aloud that you
Would've been my wife
Right about that time
Is when I come back to life
And let you know
I'd let you know (That all along)

I was faking my own suicide
Because I know you loved me
You just never realized
I was faking my own suicide
I'll walk in that room and
See your eyes open so wide
I've been so lost
Because you know
Because you know
You will never leave my side (you will never leave my side)
Until the day that I die for the first time (until I die for the first time)
And we'll laugh, yeah we'll laugh
And we will cry
So overjoyed with the love
that's so alive
Our love is so alive
.

Should I start with a question?

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 16:02:32 GMT

Or should I say what's on my mind?

So, a lot has happened in the past...ten days. lol

First off, I am the new Miss Rancho San Diego 2009! Hey Oh!
(pictures here http://www.flickr.com/photos/dream_is_a_wish/)

Second, I'm eternally proud of Annie Get Your Gun. My sister, and Sam pulled that show off like crazy. With all the things against them, i'm so impressed. And my brother was phenomenal. Three months ago, he wouldn't sing along in the car...now he's a feature in a musical. Who would have thought?

Know what else no one would have thought? That a boy like him would be interested in a girl like me... nothing is happening right now, but it looks promising. Like, this is legit. This is really happening..to me! I've screwed up my life for the past ten months or so and here he is still wanting to talk to me, and take me to lunch, and invite me over for a movie night... it's exciting and fun.

School... ok well, i dropped my math class, and my theater class? I'm failing it. I know i am. I'm scared to go back... honestly. My acting class is usually fun. Jason and I make the best of it... and i'm not even really upset with my teacher for having me redo my monologue. She's right, there's something i could change and i want to perfect it.

My heart goes out to my sister...

I'm starting Accutane all over again. Yay blood work...

Oma and Opa are going to Holland on Friday. I would give anything in the world to go with them. Even my crown...My uncle is dying, and i want to go kiss his cheek once more before he goes.

Alright, ending with lyrics...

Please don't mind what I'm trying to say cause I'm, I'm being honest
When I tell you that you
You're part of the reason I'm so set on the rest of my life
Being a part of you
You tell me what you think about being open,
About being honest with yourself

Cause things will never be the same.

So I guess I'll see you, see you around
I'm spinning, whoa I'm falling down
Now you know why I'm begging you to stay

Well don't waste time getting to the point, cause I'm, I'm patiently waiting
For your next phone call, your next excuse for losing sleep again
Tell me what you think about being open,
About being honest with yourself

this is a really random request

Wed, 14 May 2008 00:21:07 GMT

But can you comment with your First and Middle name?

kthxbye

Writer's Block: Almost Famous

Tue, 22 Apr 2008 02:40:49 GMT

What do you want to be famous for?

View 501 Answers

being an amazing actress. i want to be in movies so bad it hurts. there's movies i can't wait because i yearn to be in them so badly...

story of my life....

Tue, 15 Apr 2008 02:53:50 GMT

Here in this diary,
I write you visions of my summer.
It was the best I ever had.
There were choruses and sing-alongs,
And not a spoken feeling.
Of knowing that right now is all that matters.
All the nights we stayed up talking
And listening to 80's songs;
Quoting lines from all those movies that we love.
It still brings a smile to my face.
I guess when it comes down to it...

Being grown up isn't half as fun as growing up:
These are the best days of our lives.
The only thing that matters
Is just following your heart
And eventually you'll finally get it right.

Breaking into hotel swimming pools,
And wreaking havoc on our world.
Hanging out at truck stops just to pass the time.
The black top's singing me to sleep.
Lighting fireworks in parking lots,
Illuminate the blackest nights.
Cherry cokes under this moonlight summer sky.
2015 riverside, it's time to say, "goodbye."
Get on the bus, it's time to go.

Being grown up isn't half as fun as growing up:
These are the best days of our lives.
The only thing that matters
Is just following your heart,
And eventually you'll finally get it right.

In This Diary ~ Ataris

it's a complicated emotion...

Mon, 14 Apr 2008 23:45:56 GMT

So it's been an interesting last couple days. Kelly's party was amazing, utterly amazing. But as i was there, enjoying the party, i couldn't shake the feeling that those days are numbered. it may seem obvious, but i mean... i'm not going to always have a bunch of friends sitting around a campfire laughing about random things. I sat looking around just absorbing it all. I'm not taking a single day for granted. but it was still a blast.

then, Jason and i stayed up til 3 this morning. we were talking about tons of stuff. Mostly how we've become so integrated into each others' lives. it's so cool. i love that boy more than i'll ever be able to verbalize. I'm so IN LOVE with him, it's amazing.

then, today i found a cowboy. He is gay. His name is Hank. I'll post a picture of him later.

And thomas. jeeze, that boy. i don't even know where ot start with him. i love him with all my heart. and i hate seeing him stuck on this emotional roller-coaster. i hate it, i hate that i can't fix it, i hate that even when i do listen while he talks or whatever, i feel like i'm not getting anywhere. i mean, i feel like my words are so insufficient. i wish i had a magic answer. but i like that he trusts me. i love that he'll call me just to vent. i love that he knows i'm there whenever wherever.

old friends are cool. friends who you thought had walked out of your life. friends who you cherished memories of, but though that's all you'd ever have. it's cool.

So WoVEn did incredibly in Canada. i'm so proud of each and every one of them. I'm prouder than i thought i would be. but at the same time, i hate that i wasn't there. I hate that i'm not part of the choir i deserve to be in. Don't get me wrong, i love FanFare so so much. All of them are special to me, and being in it with Thomas, Wendy, Claire, Ian, David... so many more. I love being the assistant conductor (that's an indescribable gift) but i still long everyday to be in WoVEn. I wish with all my heart that i was challenged, that i was growing as singer, that i had the companionship of those 15 women...

senoir activities... blech.
AP gov practice test...blech

Writer's Block: I Left My Heart in...

Sat, 12 Apr 2008 18:19:56 GMT

What do you love about where you live?

View 501 Answers

San Diego: Twenty minutes from the beach, the mountains, the boarder and the desert. The temp right now is 85 degrees Fahrenheit. Also, I've lived here all my life. My suburb is small enough to know most people but not big enough to feel lost. I love living in a tourist city because there's so much to do all the time. Sea World, Disneyland, Downtown, countless others. So many great place to go. I love it here. If you've never been to So Cal, come!

To: Elphaba

Mon, 07 Apr 2008 01:15:50 GMT

I don't get it... i don't know why you won't let me be your best friend. I tried to stick by you though this all (at least, i think i did) but you don't want me. You want people who don't know that you're the wrong one. You don't want to hear the tough-love, you wants the "wow, he's a jerk, don't listen to them". sorry, but i'm not going to give that to you. I miss who you used to be, i miss the best friend i once had, i miss so many things about last year. I wish i had it all back...

but for the record, I forgive you.

Mood: Disapointed

Each of these things are on my mind at the moment...

Sat, 05 Apr 2008 03:56:48 GMT

Cookies are good with coffee.

Disney Channel has gone downhill since i was a kid.

I'm not a kid anymore... weird.

I'm sad there's no Balthy's House tonight.

I want to be famous, very soon.

I have 2 auditions to prepare for.

I'm excited for the 2 auditions I have.

Zack and Cody is semi-entertaining.

I need to stop biting my nails.

Prom is soon, yay.

graduation is soon, yay-ish.

I'm bored.

Blockbuster hasn't called me about my job yet.

I'm done.

Ditch Day and the surrounding events

Fri, 04 Apr 2008 22:57:20 GMT

So... I ditched today, but not for the sake of ditch day. I needed a mental break; an emotional vacation.

I woke up at 8:30, cleaned house and went to lunch with mom. Then I picked up my brother from school (which is fun because his friends like my car) and went dress shopping (not with my brother, he went home).

I did end up going to school for theater class. I had a scene to do and wasn't going to ditch out on Darrel. We totally rocked the scene, too.

It's weird that that's probably the last scene for class that i'll ever do on that stage. Where have the last four years gone? I can't believe it's almost over. WHHS has been my home for so long, my safe place, my sanctuary. And soon i won't belong there anymore. There's going to be DramaKids who i don't know. I'm going to go to shows and not know any of the backstage stuff, i'm going to watch choir concerts and not know the songs... how am i supposed to function? I'm not going to know what to do with myself.

I already don't know what to do with myself. I have very few friends, like... 2. Only one at school, and while they mean the world to me, i need a girl-friend. I need someone to watch chickflicks with, i need someone to vent to, i need someone to 'aw' over cute stuff with me. I love those boys with all my heart and would die without either of them, but still... it's killing me. Every girl at school has decided to either a) not be my friend any more or b) side with the girl who isn't speaking to me. I don't get it. And i know i have a couple other girl-friends, but they're not at school, they have their own lives. I don't want to find a new group of friends now because i'm almost done here and the effort would be wasted... gah, i'm so stuck.

So i guess i was supposed to do airbands today even though i told ASB i wasn't... w/e. they're dumb.

I can't deal with abandonment issues when they aren't my own.

ah well. I suppose i'll get over it eventually. it's just gonna suck getting there.

Oh, this is a cool video btw.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K2cYWfq--Nw&NR=1

Mood: Lonely

♪♪♪ lah dee dah dee dah ♪♪♪

Sat, 29 Mar 2008 18:37:09 GMT

so i went to a scholarship interview yeasterday. it was stressful, but fun too. i think i'm one of the only people who actually likes interviews. I had like 3 yesterday and i enjoyed them... i hope i get something from all this. I saw Cinderella too. it was pretty good. Cinderella herself was too "anne of green gables" saying Cindy's lines. it got on my nerves. they should have waited a year to do that show then i could have been Cinderella. *sigh* another dream role just out of reach...what's my count on that now? oh yeah, 4. That sucks.

I supposed to practice my scene with Darrel, but i can't get a hold of him... i don't know if it'll work out if he doesn't call me back.

my brother got Navy Sea Cadet of the Year today. It was impressive. But it meant that my butt was out of bed and in the car at 7:00. that's too early to be alive. and it was cold and windy at the base...but one of the official officers asked me to take pictures of the event. that was cool. they're gonna put them on the web site. i'm excited.

Speaking of pictures, i took senior pictures of Cassie, Jen and Rachel the other day. i was so proud of myself. I need to give them the CDs though. i probly do it at school... if anyone else wants them done let me know.

so now... i'm sitting here. typing. cold. bored.

such is my life...

Introduction

Thu, 27 Mar 2008 03:33:49 GMT

Hola livejournal world... it's Angela. i lost my old password and made a new LJ. does anyone even do LJ anymore? i do... but i'm kinda old school. w/e. i'll have random rants, pictures, song lyrics, lots of stuff...

read if you wanna, comment if you wanna, care if you wanna.